My Strange Addiction: The Target Christmas Corner

(I promised. I'm delivering.) 

I've said it before and I'll say it again (and again next year...and again the year after that...) -- the day they set up the Christmas corner at Target is one of my most favorite days of the year (which should give you some insight on the level of excitement I have in my life). Do not for a second think I'm not there every day the week after Halloween, Starbucks Peppermint Mocha in hand, giving the red-shirted employees (who this time of year I like to refer to as 'elves' obviously) pointers in how to arrange all the merchandise. 

This year (dare I say it out loud or record it for posterity?) I have to say I'm a tiny bit disappointed in what I've discovered over the past two weeks. And yes, every time I've been to Target (daily) I pop back to the Christmas corner to take a peek -- even if I'm just running in for milk. And lip balm that comes in a fun ball. And colorful sharpies. And maybe mini M&Ms. 

Let's start with the artificial tree/ornament section. First of all, WHY THE HELL AREN'T ALL OF THE TREES DECORATED??  

Buddy would be so disappointed. I'm no marketing major, but it seems to me they'd sell a lot more ornaments if they were oh, I don't know, DISPLAYED ON THE TREES. And speaking of the ornaments, I have two big problems with them this year. One, many of them are repeats from the past two years (and the fact that I know this should speak volumes) and two, they're kind of tacky.  

Sequins. Gak.  

But then I turn around and see this and the sequins are instantly forgiven.

I'm still trying to decide between the pink or light blue. I agree. Both. 

Speaking of repeats, I have most of these tags already, Target, so now what am I supposed to get this year to add to the shoebox full that I've been collecting for the past 6 or 15 years??

Huh? What's that you say? 
This year you have TAGS SHAPED LIKE LITTLE FLAGS??

TAGS IN AN ADORABLE TINY PAIL?

Never mind. 

Moving on to perhaps my favorite aisle; the aisle that is infinitely the most dangerous to me; the aisle that Husband wishes I'd be blind to every year when he has to buy yet another under-the-bed sized tub for the kazillion rolls of wrapping paper I keep collecting -- *cue angelic choir and trumpet fanfare*

The wrapping paper aisle. The holy grail of the Christmas corner.

At the risk of offending Target, I will admit that there are a lot cuter and much better quality wrapping papers out there. But NOT AT $3 A ROLL, sister. No kidding, last year I was at The Container Store and practically had to buy a bib to catch all the drool that was leaking from my gaping mouth as I made my way around the aisles of vintage-y and retro-hip wrapping paper and accoutrements. If you love paper and want to swoon, click this link. But then look at the price. NINE BUCKS A ROLL. Who?? Who spends NINE BUCKS A ROLL on wrapping paper? I'll tell you who. People who might just as well wrap the damn presents in actual bucks, that's who (paper bucks, not male deer). Oh sure, I could buy thick, luscious wrapping paper (for $9 a roll in case you forgot) that has adorable little foxes in Santa hats on it at The Container Store, but could I buy paper with the adorable boys of One Direction on it there? I THINK NOT. 

I'm wrapping all of Thing 1's presents in it
and she will not even care what is in the boxes.
Thank you, Target.

Moving on. 

Target does a great job making me salivate over plain ornaments in funky colors that look like a box of delicious candy when they're all together (which results in me buying them) but that are not exciting at all when you take them out and hang them on your tree (which results in me cursing them. The ornaments...not Target. Never, never Target). But couldn't you just stand and stare at this colorful row forever? Or for at least 20 minutes? 

I've also gotten sucked into the adorableness of the tiny trees with the tiny boxes of tiny ornaments and the tiny tree skirts a time or two. Or three. 

Sure, when you're in that aisle, a hot pink tree with turquoise ornaments sounds fun and whimsical until you get home and the only place you can find to stick it is in the laundry room. Where, believe me, no one in my house really goes that often. 

But still. Despite the bare trees and the tacky sequined ornaments and all the things I buy that I regret almost immediately, the Target Christmas corner is my little escape. Maybe it's because this time of year the temperature in Minnesota is dropping faster than Miley Cyrus's reputation and strolling through there with my hot cup of mocha makes the cold weather seem right and justified; maybe it's because if I'm there it means I'm not at home feeling guilty for not cleaning a bathroom or folding laundry; maybe it's just simply because I love Christmas (and Target).

Whatever the reason, it unapologetically makes me happy — no matter how many times the "elves" give me the stink eye for loitering. 

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