Wednesday, July 11, 2012

I can die now.

Like most people, I count my High School and college graduations, my wedding day and the births of my children as my life's major moments.

Until today.

With apologies to Saguaro High School, ASU, NAU, Husband and the Things, something happened earlier today that trumped them all.

Scott Baio re-tweeted me.

Wait....what??

SCOTT BAIO RE-TWEETED ME.

I can die now.

I couldn't write this earlier because it's literally taken all day for the oxygen to return to my fingertips.

To understand - just a little - the mind-blowingness of this and the hysteria that ensued (and is still 'ensuing' now...10 hours later), I should give you a brief history of my childhood obsession/infatuation/mania with Scott Baio (synonyms, I'm aware, but you need to combine all 3 to get to the level I was at from about 1979-1983).

Yes, I did just spend 15 min. google-imaging these photos and creating this collage.
And nope, I'm not at all embarrassed about it.
Other than my inappropriate older-man crush on Donny Osmond (it's no secret I had/have Daddy issues. Whatever.), Chachi Arcola was IT for me.  I died (along with the studio audience) every time he made his entrance on Happy Days.  And I believe I've told you before that a fun fact about me that I'm quite proud of is that I can still sing the theme song to "Joanie Loves Chachi" by heart. I obviously do not have a lot of depth.

I'm not at all embarrassed to admit that I was one of probably 200 people who not only bought his album (shut up) but knew the lyrics to every song and defended his vocal ability to all the critics.  My best friend and I spent hours lying on my bedroom floor passing this album cover back and forth absolutely swooning listening him sing (to us, of course) to tell him...
"guurrrlll...what was in that kiss, that made me feel like this?".

When I was about 10 my family took a trip to Magic Mountain in CA and upon arrival discovered that Scott Baio would be performing LIVE there that day.  
I cried. 
One, because I was so overwhelmed with emotion and love and adoration and the thought of seeing him in person just crushed me to tears....
and two, because I had worn my hair in dog-ears that day.

So maybe, then, you can understand how it felt to open up my email this morning and see this -

And seriously....DirecTV did just take Nickelodeon away and I WILL be making a call.

Ask my kids if I went a little berserk.
If I maybe ran around like I'd just chopped off my fingertip with a butcher knife.
If I paused mid-run to do a strange happy jig and shout, "HE KNOWS I'M ALIVE! HE KNOWS I'M ALIVE!"
If I had to sit for a moment with my head between my knees taking deep breaths IN through my nose...OUT through my mouth.
If I fumbled with my phone/ipad/computer trying desperately to pull up his actual page to see if, in fact, he had re-tweeted me (which I couldn't do and Thing 1 had to do for me because my hands were shaking....and because I do not know how Twitter actually works).

Proof. He knows I'm alive!
Oh, and believe me - this photo will be ironed on a nightshirt and pillow case ASAP.
And maybe a mouse-pad.  And a coffee mug...

And what is funny is that over the past few months I've had an idea brewin' for a blog post on how different it is for tweens and teens today to stalk stay up-to-date on the daily minute-by-minute happenings of their celebrity crushes.  

Thing 1 can tell us (and believe me...she does) 20x a day what the boys of One Direction are doing...what they are eating...who they are kissing...what they are allergic to and show us photos of them doing it all.  Constantly
Not sayin' I can't/don't do the same with celebrities via Twitter.  It's just so different from when we were kids and only had access to seeing them or hearing them if they were on television or if we saw their photos in Tiger Beat. They lived their exiting lives only in our imaginations (and the fact that to help me get to sleep I would sometimes play a little game I liked to call, "What is Scott Baio doing right now?" might add to the momentousness of this story and will hopefully not make you laugh at me too hard. But I stopped doing that in like 1995 1984).

Was it better then?  Not sure.  More romantic? Absolutely.  Nevertheless, I'd have given anything in 1982 to know what Scott Baio ate for dinner or that he had the flu last week or have been able to see current photos of him every day.  And it would have absolutely blown my little mind to know that one day I'd be able to know when he played golf, what he was cooking for breakfast, and seen photos of him out with his family - all on my phone.  

And I'd love - LOVE - to go back in time and tell my 12 year old self that one day he'd read something I wrote and he'd like what I said enough that he'd send it along to 50,000 of his friends (but I don't have to wonder what I'd have done.  Flatlined is what I'd have done).  

I just wish he didn't have to see my Twitter photo wearing those stupid New Year's Eve glasses.
Might as well as have had dog-ears.

It'll take me a long time to come down from this one.
Thankfully Husband and the Things are used to my 'crazy' and are very well-aware of the Baio-lovin' girl who still lives in me...and who just had one of her biggest tweeny-boppin' fantasies come true.  

*sigh*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

UPDATE!! Friday, October 5.....
Geesh, Scott, just friend me already.


48 comments:

  1. Michelle,

    You are just so damn funny!!! I love your blog posts and this one had me almost peeing my pants for so many different reasons: 1) the Scott Baio phenomenon of the 70's/80's, 2) the twitter re-tweet (I have no idea how twitter works either) and 3) the current teen culture. As you know, we stayed in the same hotel as One Direction in LA the night after the Kids Choice awards. Sarah was able to figure out exactly what they were doing, where they were going next etc. I had no idea and had no idea how I would figure it out if I were at gun point!! Keep writing ... I want to keep laughing with you! Peggy P.S. I clicked Anonymous because I have no idea what the hell the rest of the options mean!! Crap. Another thing I need to learn....

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  2. Oh oh oh! I know somebody that is >< this close to knowing Scot Baio! Well I am >< this close to knowing that somebody...okay, I follow somebody(this would be you)! What a wonderful wonderful day you had! Maybe I should follow Mickey Dolenz on twitter and see if he knows I am alive??

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  3. OH MY GOD.

    I would die.

    This post is hilarious!!! LOVE IT!!!!!

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  4. you get funnier and funnier by the post! holy crap i loooooove you!

    like 10 years ago, a local valley radio station had scott baio on and i called in and got to talk to him! charles in charge was my shiiiiit and i had to tell him. sooo awesome that he retweeted you! love it!

    also - OMGG you went to saguaro!? my ex boyfriend in high school went there.. (i went to a private, catholic school... not xavier, a newer co-ed high school in waaaaay north scottsdale). such a small world! they totally redid it a few years back.. it looks really good now!

    you made my night with this post!
    ps- i think you and hubs should come back to tempe this football season for a game ;) xoxoxo

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  5. Best post of the day! You totally need to tweet this blog post so he can read it!!

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  6. OMG!!!! That is awesome!! I would die!!!
    ♥ Kyna

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  7. omg tigerbeat. LOL congrats on the re-tweet :)

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  8. ERMAHGERD, SCORT BAIORRR?!?! You is famous...

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  9. Thanks for the laughs, sharing this now!

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  10. "Scott Baio once retweeted me" needs to be your Twitter bio. Also, are those Swedish Fish on your Twitter homepage? I just tried to eat my screen.

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  11. He was my older man crush when he was in Charles in Charge. I used to get cramps in my eyeballs from rolling them when my dad would call him Chachi. Get with the times, DAD! I can't believe he retweeted you. That makes me want to get twitter, just for the possibility that my celebrity crushes might retweet my posts.

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  12. I only loved Scott Baio in Charles in Charge. I have no idea what I thought that show was the THE BEST. And I sincerely disliked him a few years ago when there was some reality show about him. He was such a whiner. Oh poor me, I was a child actor and can't get my life straight.

    But your post about his retweet is hysterical. If JOey McIntyre from NKOTB were to do that for me, I would do exactly what you did.

    And I have never met another soul who called pig tails dog ears. We called them doggie ears but dog ears is the closest I've ever heard! My mother never called them pigtails. And I always got smacked with the brush for squirming when she ripped my hair to part it. Oh was that just me? Not part of the whole doggie ears thing?

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  13. Oh girl, I so get this. I was all about Scott Baio back in the day. Did you see him on Anderson Live this week? I just posted that same photo (with the yellow shirt) on my Facebook page this week. haha Memories of Tiger Beat and Chachi. Hilarious!

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  14. AHHHHHHHHHHH! YOU know that I KNOW exactly what you are experiencing!!!!!!!!!!! (I wish I could use hearts for my exclamation points instead of dots.) Fantastic!

    And I remember that album! But is it just me or did every heart throb pose like that (Shaun Cassidy, Leif Garret, Michael Jackson, Andy Gibb, etc.), amiright? Never realized that before. Ellen

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  15. Wow! I don't know what I would do if I were retweeted by one of my childhood crushes. Definitely freak out but, ooooooh, to ponder the specifics!

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  16. This is so great on so many levels!! Who can't relate to your love of Scott Baio? I used to have his face plastered all over my walls as a pre-teen and watch all his shows. I couldn't be happier for you!!!! You'll have to never wash that tweet :-)

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    1. I've gotten a LOT of mileage from that tweet and the subsequent "favorite" (see the link at the bottom of the post). My family is SO sick of me saying, "I know him. He loves me." every time we see him on Nickelodeon or in a magazine or random talk show. But I mean, it's totally true, right??

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  17. I know I've already commented on this, but I just noticed your Twitter handle was @hellonewman21, which I love. Goodbye now.

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    1. hellonewman is and has been my personal email since email started. And yes, it's a Seinfeld thing. Because we got SO sick of everyone saying it to us back in the day and thinking they were so terribly clever. It was my twitter handle before I changed it to match the blog. Branding, ya know. ;)

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  18. I am dying!!! First, my sister was a die-hard Scott Baio fan. She had his record, too. I can't wait to show her this. Second, I still hope and pray that Taylor Kitsch will get a real twitter so that I can hope he'll retweet me. This is so awesome that I did a little jig for you. Mine, back in the day, was Matt Dillon. Maybe I'll stalk him a little bit to see if I can get a retweet. Third, I absolutely LOVE your blog name. I say these exact words all the time. :) Consider me a new follower (and how the heck it took so long, I have no idea).

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    1. Yep -- the blog name comes from me telling a chosen member of the family that on a daily or weekly basis. Depending on who scooped the cat box or emptied the dishwasher or refilled my wine glass.
      Matt Dillon was AWEsome! Still is. Go forth and stalk.
      Thanks for following and for chatting with me! Happy to have you along for the ride!! :)

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  19. Haha, awesome. I would be just as excited if John Krasinski re-tweeted me. I'd also be like, "HE KNOWS I'M ALIVE!"

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    1. Ooh. John Kasinksi. That would be a good one. Sigh.

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  20. I'm so jealous! I used to be a big Scott Baio fan too. But do you know what's sad? The fact that he only has 50K followers! Crazy

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    1. Do you know what's even sadder? That I'm like 40K of them.
      Nah, but he's hot and cold on Twitter so maybe that's the issue? Because it's certainly not the fact that he's a teen star from THE 70'S. ;)

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  21. This is awesome! I got excited when Bart Yasso (a veritable celebrity in the running world) replied to one of my tweets and then followed me. Then I sent the screenshot to my husband (who's also a runner). And he was like, who?

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    1. Twitter is creepily cool like that. Love it!
      Thanks for reading!!

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  22. Coming over from the Dose Girls. Love it! Joanie loves Chachi was da bomb.

    Can I brag that my favorite singer - who was really big in the 80s - actually REPLIED to my tweet last year and I nearly died, too!? It was Bryan Adams. Omigosh. That's why I love Twitter.

    BTW, while you were hanging out at Saguaro High in the 80s I was at Agua Fria. Our perms and neon may have passed each other at MetroCenter!

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    1. Excellent! It's entirely possible! ;)
      You have total cred getting a REPLY from Bryan Adams. HE KNOWS YOU ARE ALIVE!!!! Isn't it an amazing feeling??
      Thanks for popping over!!

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  23. Dose Girls sent me over and I'm glad they did! Oh, to be retweeted by Scott Baio...

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    1. Thanks for popping by! It was a great day that is fun to be re-living thanks to the lovely Dose Girls!!

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  24. I had that same crush! And now I have a new life dream. Or maybe just a February 2014 goal...
    Scott, it's on.

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  25. I am over here from the Dose Girls. That is WAY.AWESOME. I watched Happy Days ONLY for him. You now are just 1 degree of separation from Scott Baio because if a celebrity retweets something you wrote, they totally know you. Absolutely counts.
    And hold on- Direct TV cancelled Nickelodean??

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    1. This was written a year and a half ago and yeah, they did for like two weeks. RIGHT BEFORE 'SEE DAD RUN' debuted. I was dying. But it was all fixed in time. Now my 12 yo and I watch that show all the time and I get my Baio fix! :)

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  26. Have you seen Zac lately making the talk show circuit?? HOLY HELL he looks yummilicious. And yeah, totally totally inappropriate for me to be thinking that, but in my mind I'm like 24 so it's all good. ;)
    Thanks for reading!
    Now let's sing some Joanie Loves Chachi together and sway.

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  27. That was absolutely hysterical. I would be on top of the moon too if he retweeted me too...or anyone famous for that matter. And I loved that show too but I don't remember a thing that went on on it. Or Happy Days either for that matter. Is it age? I probably would remember if I saw the re-runs. Sad what age does to you!! But you are right, things are so different. Kids today know everything about what is going on in celebrities lives...makes me glad I don't live in a glass room like that. I would hate people knowing so much about me. The personal trainer, personal chef, housekeeper, etc would be nice though.

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    1. It has kind of heightened my expectations on Twitter, I have to say. Now whenever I tag some celebrity in a post I run around all day thinking for SURE they're going to RT it or 'favorite' it. Sadly, it hasn't happened again.
      And yeah, I'll take the perks but not the bubble of being a celebrity. A price they pay, for sure.
      Thanks for commenting!! :)

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  28. Michelle, I believe I'm a touch older than you for although I did think Scott B. was awesome, Donny Osmond was the God of all Gods! I would sing into a purple hairbrush or purple magic marker with you and do harmony to any of his songs when we get together. Get your act primed because I'm ready.to.go! Loved this. You are a STAR!!

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    1. And HE STILL IS. One of my bucket list items is to see Donny & Marie in Vegas before they end their show there. And I'm not ashamed at ALL to admit that! "Morning Side of the Mountain" -- you and me -- it's ON. xo

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  29. OHMYGOSH THIS IS HILARIOUSLY AWESOME!!!!!!! I am starstruck on YOU now.... and WOWZA me likesee Scott TOO!!! But- not half as much as you...actually not a quarter either. Perhaps I like him 1/457th of what your feelings are- and perhaps I need to not even be in your category because you say love- and quite frankly, I only love Kevin Costner.

    If you happen to get retweeted by him? Let me know, wouldya?

    *PS: I couldn't open your new link for the update- said problem loading page?

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  30. Amazingly well awesome, you. I LOVE Scott. Ok actually I'm totally lame, wondering whether he's Charles in Charge? IF so, LOVED him and holy shit to him retweeting you. Also, LOVE THIS. Glad that the Dose Girls featured your freakiness today ;)

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  31. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who would have a fit if a character I had a crush on while I was a teenager acknowledged me today. This is so cute and funny. I'm so utterly glad I got to read it.

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  32. Stopping by from the Dose of Reality and I love this post! I totally know how you feel! I got a retweet and then later a direct response from Jason Ritter and I was so excited you would have thought I won the lottery. This was two-fold too because I was obsessed with John Ritter when I was younger (what did you say about inappropriate older-man crushes?) and then of course fell in love with his son when he was on Parenthood. Congratulations on your retweet! You should print out the screen shot and frame it!

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  33. Oh, my! Now, I have to admit, that while I'm not totally with you on the Scott Baio thing, I truly, truly understand. It would be like Leif Garrett retweeting me or if we're talking tween years for me it would be Ricky Schroder. Seriously, I could not get enough Silver Spoons. I'm so happy your dreams just came true. And a coffee mug is totally in order. And a mouse pad. That way every time you go to the computer you remember he's there watching you. :)

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  34. That is too cool and here I was all excited that I got a retweet from Chobani yogurt :) I used to be a big fan of Donny as well, but David Cassidy was the bomb. Stopping by from The Dose of Reality.

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I love your comments. They let me know I'm talking to someone besides my cats during the day. Check back ~ I'll reply if I'm not too busy napping.